The truth behind my excuses

When I don't really want to do something, I often use my favourite cultural barrier excuse: They won't understand me when I approach them because even though it sounds like we speak the same language, there are so many nuances that are different, it feels like a completely different language.  It's my favourite reasoning to not doing many things and it sits on the tip of my tongue many times a day.  Pathetic, huh?  I use it more here than when I was living in Bangladesh and people legitimately came from a very different culture and spoke a very different language.  When I was in Bangladesh, everything felt like an adventure and I loved opportunities to throw myself at them.  Catching the local bus, for example, which many expats never attempted.  I would have to cover my head with a scarf and practice the little bit of Bangla that I possessed, sitting up the front with the ladies, or just squeezing in where ever there were two centimetres for space, nervously watching out the window and wondering if we were headed in the right direction.  I take that back; others were far greater adventures than I.  They understood more of the culture, were far more fluent in the language, and were more willing to get to know the locals.  But compared to some of the expats, living in their expat world, I was Tarzan.

Have you ever put something off for so long that when you finally went to do it, you realised you didn't really want to do it at all?  That in fact, all your sensible reasoning was really avoidance?  I'm currently putting something off.  This time, my verbal reasoning {what I tell people} is that I've been too busy and I have been waiting to finish school to get to it.  My inner voice reasoning {what I tell myself} is that this is a cultural thing: I'm not sure how to go about it here in the States.  If I were in NZ, people would do it in a similar way as I want to, and it would be easier.  But I realise now that the true reason is that I'm just a tiny bit nervous.  Actually, I'm significantly nervous.  But.  Others have done this before me so surely it can be done.  Plus everyone tells me now is the time!  And I will do it.  First thing in the morning.  You catch me if I don't.