When I face a crisis in my life, particularly with close relationships, I often use some kind of personality descriptor to find out why I have been so affected. I'm not dedicated to doing the tests or remembering much of what I learn but I do find it helpful when getting through the crisis. After a recent 'crisis', my mother and I were perusing the Enneagram types. I've never before been able to pinpoint my number, even after taking a test, but my mother pointed out she thought I was a six, which I found I was able to relate to a lot.
Number sixes, in particular, desire strong boundaries and organisation, within which we find a sense of security. I'm probably more flexible than I used to be but if boundaries are continually broken, I begin to find it difficult to operate happily and comfortably. It was nice to know this, as Jbird and I tidied up a certain aspect of our relationship. In the tidying, I felt in control again and my sense of self worth grew.
I'm no self-help writer. Just interested. I'm also glad that we're all different yet are still able to function together.
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