A perfect kinda day

The wedding rehearsal was at dusk.  The lake was as smooth as glass, surrounded by fall foliage, and a fine mist was beginning to settle on the water.  Someone suggested music for the parents and bridal party.  This was a surprise for us but we'd prepared some extra tunes and started playing Ashokan Farewell.  Reportedly, Jeff turned to Marie and gave her a big hug saying "this is my favourite song!"  We were chuffed.

Afterwards, we attended the wedding rehearsal dinner.  This is a tradition that we don't enjoy in New Zealand.  It was nice to be able to sit down with our friends and catch up on the happenings of the passed 18 months.  Marie and Jeff spent some time introducing the people involved in the wedding, including the guy who fermented a keg or two of beer in his bath tub. 

The wedding itself was lovely with spectacular scenery.  A week before, Jeff had driven near the site to get the marriage certificate.  At the time, the trees were still mostly green.  By Saturday, their wedding day, fall colours were out in their full glory for them.  Lunch afterwards was a traditional American picnic with pulled pork, mac 'n cheese, chicken, coleslaw, and hot apple cider. 

Later that night we attended the after party.  It started in a space they'd set up with photos of their experiences on the Appalachian trail.  We enjoyed cocktails and hors d'oeuvre.  After the first dance and some speeches, we moved upstairs to enjoy cake and dancing.  They'd brought in their favourite bluegrass band to help us dance into the night.  Jbird and I had a blast.  The wedding cake had a special touch: Marie and Jeff had made a huge model of the Appalachian trail with desserts corresponding to each state.  They shared a piece of blueberry pie.  

Congratulations, Mr and Mrs. Sellenrick!

Some special music

We have been charged with choosing any music we want for the aisle walks at the wedding on Saturday.  What a responsibility!  The couple are special people.  They bonded over the appalachian trail.  He walked it in 2011 and she walked it in 2012.  Do you know of the trail?  I recommend Bill Bryson's A Walk in the Woods to get an idea of the feat of walking it.  It takes months to cover.  Marie went through four backpacks and I can't say how many pairs of shoes. 

Back to them.  They started dating after she had decided to make the walk and he became her trail magic while on the walk, bringing her treats and necessary equipment, taking her out for restaurant meals, and walking with her for long stretches.  She walked all the way from Maine to Georgia and he walked from Georgia to Maine.  That's 1400 miles one way.  It's not a completely comfortable walk either.  If you'd like to read about her journey, or see some of his photos, you can go to the blog she wrote - Southbound.  I was an avid reader.  He decided to propose to her on a special peak during the walk, his timing was a complete surprise to her.  Unfortunately, the weather was awful and she just wanted to get off the mountain and wasn't sure why he was waylaying things.  An exciting surprise. 

I heard a pretty Scottish violin duet on the radio one afternoon and I quickly found the link on the internet.  It's called Leaving Lerwick Harbour.  I could only find the melody line sheet music so I had Jbird listen to the duet and transcribe it onto sheet music.  I'm glad he did it quickly because the link was erased the next day.  Unfortunately it's not there for me to share with you.  I wish you could her it though, it's really nice.  And it happens to be very fitting for the music that has come out of Appalachia.  I imagine people first came there during early settlement, people from such places as Scotland and England.  For the pre-wedding music, I have had to piece together any duets I could find and thanks to my Irish band, I have a lot of bluegrass type tunes as well as some classical pieces.  Marie and I bonded over bluegrass, she attends a festival every year.  I'm not completely sure about the end of wedding music yet but we have a few options.  It's been fun to prepare for this together and we're both looking forward to seeing some lovely friends from our time in B'more.

The Short Maturen Wedding

Jbird has made a little video of the wedding in Michigan.  I don't want to post it publicly for their privacy but if I haven't sent you a copy and you'd like to see it, please let me know so that I can email you the link.

A better description

I have to apologise for yesterday's post.  I was very, very tired and my brain couldn't think clearly.  I don't think I gave a worthy description of the wedding so I will today.  

We had pastries and custard for breakfast.  The custard was baked the night before, a northern tradition. The three host sisters agreed this was a breakfast fit for Christmas morning.  We spent the day out on the lake, Jbird went water-skiing behind a jetski.  And he rode the jetski.  The boys played frisbee football.  I think it might have been Jbird's perfect kind of day.  The ceremony itself was very very simple - nine minutes long, conducted in the living room.  There was a little wee flower girl with chubby chubby legs who sat very quietly when she needed to and stole the show afterwards with her cuteness. I was completely under dressed.   The bride didn't know she had a bouquet so she didn't hold it but it was pretty in the photos.  They opened a few presents.   We toasted with champagne.  We had wedding cake(s), huge American-sized (beef) steaks on the grill, and smores around a campfire.  The other cake (the one I didn't make) was a creamy mocha chocolate creation and dedicated to both the wedding couple and a sister who was having a birthday.   It was a great way to have a wedding.  If only the groom's entire family could have been there, it would have been perfect. 

I wore white to the wedding

We arrived back late last night, tired and sunburnt.  I wonder if you could tell from some posts last week that I wasn't exactly looking forward to our trip to Michigan.  I don't like not knowing what to expect and I hadn't known what to expect.  So much so that I put no thought at all into what I would wear to the ceremony when I was packing.  I ended up in an everyday outfit.  It was white.  The bride hadn't thought she'd wear white but she did.  Woops.  Oh well, I'm not in many photos.  I hope.  All three kiwis wore shorts and bare feet, the groom included, although his shorts were very smart.

Skyping the wedding to New Zealand didn't work, the screen froze on an image of  the ceiling and somebody's forehead.  I expected this of skype so Jbird also filmed it and will edit together a video to send home.  He makes nice videos.  

The fruitcake turned out great.  I think it was one of the best I've ever made and am thankful I bought cake flour.  I was informed that in the US, the grooms' cake was traditionally a fruit cake, so it wasn't so unusual after all.  It wasn't pretty but it was enjoyed.

The illicit cake

The thing is, I haven't asked the happy couple if they'd like a cake, nor have I been invited to bake one.  I'm just baking it and taking it.  I figure it may not be the Wedding Cake.  It certainly won't be iced in any kind of fancy way.  It may not even be liked by many people - I've only met two Americans who like fruit cake and they are in their 70s.  But Andy will like it.  He will eat a good portion of it.  And it's for him.

While I was looking for ingredients, I also wanted to find a proper cake tin.  Preferably spring-form.  Though Target ended up having all the ingredients I settled on, I had a feeling that $20 was more than I needed to pay for a tin.  At K-mart they were $10 but I still wanted to find a lower price.  America is great for deals and I wanted mine.  So I asked some friends to take me to Walmart.  Low and behold, I found three for $10.  !!! 

I'm still nervous about baking New Zealand recipes with American flour so I bought cake flour.  Instead of using measuring cups, I weighed it.  In fact, for the first time, and on Julia Child's advice, I weighed all my ingredients.  This cake is for a wedding, after all, even if it is an illicit cake for an unexpected wedding, it should still be as good as possible.  Of course, it won't have six weeks to mature but Jbird suggests I spend the week aggressively soaking it in rum to make up for it.  

It will bake for three hours at 300 degree Fahrenheit.  It's a tricky medium, I don't want to burn the edges, dry it out, OR leave it uncooked in the middle.  But I have two layers of brown paper and then baking paper thickening up the edges to help slow the outside down.  There are many intricacies to consider every time I do this.

An unexpected expected wedding

My brother is getting married in Kalamazoo, Michigan, on Saturday.  Surprised?  Me too.  We've been waiting to hear the date for a while but we all thought there would be more time than a week to prepare.  Unfortunately, it means my family will not be able to attend.  Instead, they will view it via the amazing faculties of the interweb. I was selfishly looking forward to their physical visit as I would have been able to show them around our little town too, but I'm trying to be grown up about it all and enjoy the celebration.  It's amazing really, our friends told us they could lend us their car next week.  I thought: oh well, we're really too busy to make use of it but we won't say no.  Then my brother told us we could visit that weekend.  Then he told us it would be for their wedding.  So it has worked out well - for us, at least.  I'm sure there will be more wedding related posts to come.

Are you dieing to hear?

There are many great things about being in a wedding party.  Some of my favourites are the early access to seeing the Bride's dress, having my hair and make up done, champagne with breakfast, and dressing up more than I usually do. 

This wedding was a really nice day, the weather was gorgeous. The votive candles I found in Bloomington worked perfectly, interspersed around different herbs growing in jam jars and place names written on leaves with a heart hole-punched out.  All the Aunties loved the dresses.  Silver/grey bridesmaid dresses with an interesting wrap detail, high neck and cute little poof sleeves.  Maybe I'll be able to wear this bridesmaids dress again!?  The big white dress was kind of phenomenal.  Empire cut, silk with lace over the bodice and a full skirt.  We had pink and green bouquets.  Can you picture it yet?  

The food was delicious.  There were huge New Zealand mussels for canapes, as well as different bruschetta with salmon etc.  I had a calamari entree and a scotch fillet the size of my head, cooked perfectly medium rare, nice and bloody in the middle, for my main.  I ate it all, too.  Oh, and chocolate mousse, homemade chocolate icecream and a toffee pistachio praline for pudding.  With plenty of NZ vino and bubblies in between. Then mum's decadent wedding chocolate cake for supper. 

Over the past 14 years or so, weddings have been the main way I meet up with extended family as we all live so far apart.  This may have been the last wedding from all the cousins - there have been 13 and I managed to attended 11 of them.  I hope we can still find excuses to reconnect.

entree - hors dourves in New Zealand
scotch fillet - ribeye steak

Social Situations

I want to revisit the idea of social anxiety. I have to start with an apology - I don't have a very clear head as I've recently come back from a hens type meal.  My sister - not the one to-be-wed, the other, bought a bottle of wine to share with me, hence the foggy head.  However, the time to write is now as tomorrow will be wedding wedding wedding.

Earlier in the day, at the afternoon tea part of the hens events, I was almost in tears, I didn't want to go.  I was completely overwhelmed by too many new people, and trying to feel comfortable in a situation where I didn't.  The sister - older than me and oh so much more mature - very kindly went out of her way to persuade me.  Soon after this was a rowing-on-a-lake part of the events where myself, this sister and my mother shared a boat together.  It was a perfect time of the day, beautiful light, and we were surrounded by gorgeous New Zealand native bush.  I was able to relax and we had some nice conversation.  This helped me to forget my discomfit and I then attended the evening meal almost organically.  The dinner was fun, we sat with some fun people, though my angus beef burger was a little well done.  It was funny that my entire table of six ordered the same though we didn't discuss it.

I think we all ALL suffer from social anxiety at different times.  It can't just be me - though I feel like I suffer more than most.  I'm sure others feel the same way.  Remember my original post?  I blamed living in America (click here to read).  

When I review today's anxiety, I was at my worst shortly after I'd had space to think.  Too much space.  When things were busy, I felt better and forgot my worries.  If you have been able to follow and agree with my thread of thoughts directly related to creativity coming from space and time, you might feel as bewildered as I by the idea that negativity that can also flourish in that same space.  Depending on your frame of mind and how you let things flow.  

My little sister's getting married tomorrow.  Where did the time go!?

In the folds of family

We have started the four day wedding weekend.  I drove down to Taranaki/New Plymouth today, sitting between HarryBarry and I'm-not-madsta-I'm-Mad-e-LINE.  Two Stakkas in the front seats. The scenery was superb.  Dense green New Zealand bush, full of pungas and palms.  Ocean views, white cliffs. Sheep, cattle, goats and alpacas.  The kids played I-spy-with-my-little-eye-something-purple, doctors, and cameramen.  They were gorgeous.  Lunch in a cafe on the way down was delicious.

There will be dinners, afternoon teas, nail painting, make-up and hair.  Car cleaning, house cleaning, place name marking.  We have plenty of black shoes to choose from and my relocated dress is safe and sound on a hanger.  THE dress has been revealed, I can't wait to see it on the bride-to-be.  Dad's picking Andy up from the airport and they'll bring down those votive candles I brought all the way from Indiana.  There will be high tension and drama, what would a wedding be without it? 

I'm glad.

What dress shall I wear?

When I got here, I didn't really unpack or think about anything, I just went straight to the beach for my first surf and then to visit my niece and nephew (oh, and their parents!).  It was all I could think about.  A day later, when I realised I hadn't seen my bridesmaid dress in my boxes here, my first response was to panic.  I'm talking thirty minutes of doom and gloom, I decided I'd taken it to the States and left it there!

Jbird is my saving grace when I  panic at home.  He kind of just absorbs it.  Saying things like "Well, I think the only thing you can do in this situation is to panic." and "are you panicking yet?"  It sounds sarcastic and mean but it actually helps me to think: "oh, what should I be doing?"  I've heard this of sarcasm: it's no longer considered the lowest form of wit.  It can be mean, but it can also be clever, helping the recipient to think about where it came from, and what it means, encouraging creativity in their thought process.  I'm not just saying this because I have a habit of using it, either.  Click here to read the article.

I'm packing today to go down to New Plymouth for the great wedding fête.  The bridesmaid dress is already down there, taken by my mum.  It's going to be a fun weekend but I'm glad I'm only visiting one person and her baby today, I need a rest day!

Preparing for home

In preparation to go home next Friday, EIGHT SLEEPS FROM NOW, I have bought 144 votive candles and their glass holders for a very special wedding, written a Christmas letter for family and a few select friends, and am receiving packages in the post for things people want from the States that are more expensive or not available at home.  Clothes from baby gap (so cute, Madstar and Haz are lucky little people), cowboy belts for the resident cowboy (Mr. Bird, Sr.), and a kindle for some cuzzies (still waiting, I hope it gets here in time).  Older-sis ordered a bunch of American mags too, so I’m trying to get through those.   

I am also in the process of finishing off our New Zealand Christmas shopping. “Finishing off” is an exaggeration.  I should say, starting.  Fortunately, my study has finished, placing me into a very wintery summer holiday, so I have the time to concentrate on all these things.  Unfortunately, I am far more inclined to knit and watch old episodes of the Mary Tyler Moore show.  I should get on it though.  We have dinner engagements and thanksgiving to get through before I leave.  Oh, and the black Friday sales the morning I leave.  

Really, I have no complaints.